Ah, finally my internet connection is back on again. It went dead for about two days, that sucked. Hm...about Dex, you know how I said he injured himself? Well the detail of the injury is out now. He fractured one of his spinal discs ( ouch! ) "T14" it was. Yeah, that's really horrible. Good thing he wasn't permenantly paralysed. Happy New Year Everybody! Get well sooner Dex!

I wonder if everyone's life is like dave's. at least mine is, for the past 4 days...mm what should I say? I'm living a life exactly like his (unhealthy too)..I went to bed at 8-9am and got up at 4-5pm, sometimes 7pm. I only saw daylight (and heard birds, too) in the morning which reminds me to go to bed. what keeps me up? shamefully....game. An amazing strategy game, Romance of The Three Kingdoms VIII. it's so addictive! Totally falling into that ancient world, I play more than 8 hrs a day.... ah this is not good...it's so crazy and not good for my getting-fit plan. ah, my new year resolution might be stopping playing game and living a healthy life....... Poor dex...I lost contact with him and dave since that gatherinig.(because of the reason above) ... All the best, get well please. PS: dave I still like that girl4 pic.

Ah, finished recoding the site, finally... Now I have more time to work on my "art". Actually, they are just bad sketches of girls to satisfy my adolescent erotic fantasies. ( Can I say 'erotic' here? Hell yeah! It's my blog! ) *ahem* anyways. I'm not used to daylight anymore. I just saw some birds fly by my window, imagine that, birds! My schedule for the past few days was very screwed up. I would sleep at 8:00am, then wake up at 5:00pm. I didn't see day light for the past three days already. Not healthy at all, that's gotta change. ChangPing invited Dex and I to go and watch a movie today. She said she'll call Rachel too. However it seems Dex can't go. It seemed that he injured himself rather badly while skiing yesterday. Now he's lying in bed unable to move. It isn't life threatening though. And no, he didn't break any bones, which is good news. Get well soon Dex.

My days are getting more and more loney, everyone is busy with things to do or people to meet, yet for me there aren't a thing. No one to talk to, no one to see, and no one on MSN, nothing interesting, nothing exciting, and nothing fun.... This always happen around Christmas, I am starting to hate Christmas, because I am not even able to play my favorite music. 555555..... :'(

I agreed this isn't a big deal. I wasn't disturbed because of a loss of "mian zi", hell I didn't even thought about it until it was brought up. I believe I was disturbed because of a shock to my core values of how friends should interact. It's terribly self-centered and stupid of me to judge others by my own standards. Well, I'm no saint, and I can be pretty egoestical sometimes. I don't think I'm enraged, just feeling disturbed. Gimme some time, it should disappear.

Oh yeah..I guess somebody is extremely not happy about that dinner. I thought everything was OK when we played in UC��but I guess I have to say something after seeing the harsh words downstairs. First, yes, we are poor. We don't have an income, and our parents are new immigrants who are not wealthy. If we were considered as friends of somebody, would he let us spend much money on something which is not worth that much? Right, I know the theory about "friendship" and "loyalty". And I know somebody wants to help that poor business because his family are friends of its owners. Aside from how irrational the price is and the reason this business is not running well, it's true that if he walked out of the restaurant, it'd be horrible and terribly disrespectful FOR HIM. But does this help have to come from us? I mean his friends will not necessarily be our friends. They are just strangers in some sense. Why would we stay? For example, would you give some big money to a stranger (not homeless ppl) on the street? Plus, if you really want to help them DEEPLY from you heart, why don't you eat there everyday? Why don't you work there full-time for free? In a word, the reason that somebody is pissed off and embarrassed is just that we didn't give him "mian zi". There's no such word in English. I don't want to say something like, hey this is Canada, we should do things as what Canadians do, and I still truly appreciate the Chinese tradition that friendship is important. I just don't think the situation downstairs has anything to do with the nice tradition. And it's not relevant to our core value either. Yes somebody and us are friends and I treasure this friendship, but this doesn't mean somebody has the right to order us to do whatever IN HIS SITUATION is right. We do things because we have our reasons. Sigh~ "mian zi" is rather important in Chinese culture (although I think it's bad and foolish). Fine, let's say we were supposed to give him "mian zi". Well we could have. We asked him to tell the boss that it's us, these "horrible and terribly disrespectful" friends, wanted to leave, but not him, so he'd have no reason to feel embarrassed. He could have promised the boss that he would bring some richer friends next time. If somebody is mad and even thinks of ending the friendship with us just because he felt he had lost his "mian zi" without trying to make things perfect, I'm sorry for him and I can say "sorry" to him too because of sympathy. Ohh I have said enough. Still, I don't think this thing is a big deal. I don't wanna argue any more, and I still consider everybody as my friend. WOW it's Dec 25th now! MERRY CHRISTMAS~~~~:D got any nice presents? ;)

I was put into a rather difficult bind yesterday during the dinner. Some people wanted to leave because of the price of the food. Which in my opinion isn't all THAT much compare to similar restaurants. That wasn't the problem though. The problem was that the store was owned by a family that is very close to me. They only started running the business half a year ago, and aren't making very much money. I havn't done anything to support their business up till then, hence I felt rather guilty about it. Even Dex went and supported them by eating there when they just opened up. I understand how some people didn't want to spend money. After all, almost none of us have jobs or any kind of income. I offered to pay for them, but they still refused. It's the holidays, and I was among friends, plus I was in the restaurant of close friend as well. In such a situation, I don't mind spending money, even when I'm poor. Friendship outweights monetary things any day. Khai understood that imidiately, the value of respect and loyalty are more well understood by kungfu guys I suppose. I know the others had good intentions, but it's just such a shock to me that our core values are so different. Once again, I DON'T CARE about spending more money there, I simply must support them. There were no way I would walk out on them. Such an act would be horrible and terribly disrepectful. I was deeply disturbed, I even questioned if I really want to associate myself with such people. I'm still very disturbed by it. I understand that I writing this out would definitly offend people. But if I don't get it out of my chest, I'm afraid I would eventually drift away from them. Friendship is partially about communication, and here I'm letting people know how my feelings. You did a good job yesterday Dex, don't worry too much about it.

It was so tiring yesterday, but it was fun for the most parts. It wasn't really my party, I organized it because my friends from Western tech high had this gathering last year at this time, also because since I was very greatful for Sam invided me to his little party last year, so I promissed Sam that I'll through a party too, he might of forgot but I don't easily forget a promiss. (unless extrem circomstance) On top of that since Racheal is going to be loney during this holyday, I though I should invide her, but to make things more exciting I asked Jane and Crystal to came, so Racheal won't be so loney. But most of all, I really really missed Kat, I wanted us to be together, but I think I am rushing it a bit too much. It's been a little more than three years since I met her. Thoes are the reasons why I organized this party, so after reading it Dav should have a better understanding of why I chosed it. Yes I was quite selfish I guess, because when Kat left, I totally lost my interest in everything. So the not so big group shattered all together. But thatnks to Jane and Crystal's self interest, I was able to get back to my senses. Also thanks Dav for been my best buddy and stayed with us. The four of us and Sam and David Wu went to play ping pong and pool instead of going to the movie. Now I feel I need to say sorry to the two people (Khai and Sida) that we didn't goto the movie together, but that might be the best for now, at least thoes two can be alone with each other, and Khai have the perfect excuss to be with Sida watching the movie. So after Kat left we went to University Collge and spend the night from 8:00pm to 2:00am. Where I finely repolished my skills on PingPong, Woohoo that was nice, now I wanted to play more sports like Ping Pong, and Badminten, and Workout, and Stuff. But the highlight of my whole day was the dinner, I don't need to explain that part, so for now, let it remain a wonderful memery for me, such that I know the five people present will keep ot a secret for now. I sure wished I could made that day better. Because I know I could. p.s. to Dav (The reason why D2 is good is not because of the skill tree and stuff, it is because of the fun in treasure hunt, finding cool items, unique weapons, armors, etc... That's why it is attractive, and only on Battle Net)

A lot have happened, but I felt no urge to write them down for some reason. Went to the CUA dinner two days ago. It was alright. A lot of people showed up, more than half are those who I've never seen before. No, there were no cute girls -__- . The girls there were alright, but none that really captured my attention. Had a good time talking and joking around with friends I guess. I then went to a web bar and played Diablo II (sic) with Jane and Dex. I seriously don't know why Dex likes the game so much, or why anyone still like a game that's 3 years old and is obsolete both in terms of gameplay and technology. In my old computer graphics teacher Mr. West's words: These are just itty bitty bitmaps running around the screen with mouse clicks. I don't deny that the game have it's fun factor for the first 2 hours. However, why it has such a longitivity is beyond me. No, don't even get started with all that tech-trees and skill levels crap with me. I went to watch The Two Towers with my highschool buddies. Gopy, Eva (Su), Jennifer, Momo, Justin, Noeman and Alan were there. The movie was great, I liked it. What got me thinking was the fact that after only four months apart, we had a hard time conversing to each other. Why is that? Have each one of us changed so much in only four months that we can find nothing in common? Aside from Jennifer's longer hair, I could find no major change in any one of us. Granted, none of us are the terribly extrovert and impulsive types. Still, what happened to the days when we could sit in front of the school library and talk to the day's end? On a brighter note, I found out that I could buy all volumns of the original Japanese Saikano manga at Kikiwai -- a manga store in chinatown. I bought the first three volumns already, 4 more to go.

Omega (Oh My God) ... as I am reading through a book, a book for my Humanity class which I must perform an lecture on has just stund me. This book is called "The Investigator," and the day that my first university lecture take place is very near my birhtday, and in this book on this page, it speaks "There are 119 children aged between 13-17 murdered on Feb 23rd 1943". This day is my birthday, and exactly 60 years ago, this incedence has occured. and on this upcomming Feb 23rd (60 years after 1943) I am suppose to talk about it in my lecture, on my birthday. !!! p.s. They were all killed together by Phenol incertion to the heart, in human experimentation lab. (Horrable) I wonder what kind� sign does it hold...

hi, long time no talk la guys! i'm sure everybody is enjoying their winter holiday now, right? hope you all have some unforgotable moments happened in this christmas^^(like jane~)i'm sure she is smiling even in her dream~ right jane?^v* i myself is having a wonderful holiday, totally relaxing , sat back , and eventful!! it's so free and stressfulless. a life by oneself is indeed desirable, i have never live by myself before. i can tell the fun i have missed if i have being living in school in high school. ( as people described) there is not much too worry about, no more parents constant reminding and frequent controlling. here i am an grown-up, if i can call myself so. i can use my time freely, although it's still not very efficient, but it's controlled by MY will. what more can one expect? lots fun: karaoke~~ for 3 hours with a bunch of higher years, two guys sings indeed good, oh, boy, sounds just like the original singer; pacific mall~~, i waste lots of loonies on dancing machine, not very good at it though, i can only dance the light level.it's so cool to dance fast ones, i 'll try to practice if i can borrow a dance carpet from jimmy; eating ~~Top Three Foods count down!!-->korean food NO.3, japanese food NO.2, chinese food NO.1, what can i say, toronto is great! and what's more? sleeeeeeeeeeeep, it's the thing that one never gets enough, expecially for ppl like me ! hehe.....sleep, eat, sleep, eat...what's that sounds like? ......how do i suppost to know? who cares,hehe, as long as you go to do sports!! but somehow, it doesn't work smoothly, resolution failed again...signing again, put the blame on comfy chair and bed....i need to sleep badly now...where is my bed.....i'm turning dizzy...i can hardly type..i can't believe i only woke up 5 hours ago! gees~ps:i will go to dex's party tomorrow, what's the website again? i'm not clear when and where do we meet!! plz draw a line dex!~

After a three chapters of Tokio Love Story, the cd don't work anymore, Doh. Anyways, that's not the point. After what I watched, I start recall my life, truthfully I guess I should say I liked (according to the movie defenition) many girls, as many as more than 40, but it was only until one month after I met Kat did I stop... Arggg, Damn Dex. Oh well, I liked the movie... hehe And thank you Dav and Jane for been there with me playing Diablo2exp. It really is a great game, we should play it more often. :p (but not as late next time hopefully)

Nobody is posting? Even Dave is tooo lazy to write?? Jeez.....Anyways, yeah, life is pretty good. I'm done all my exams(well..only one...) -_-'......and I have enjoyed my holidays VERY MUCH. mmm what did I do? I slept a lot, which is the most important thing (I got up at 4pm or something :P). I watched anime (thanks to dave), hung out with my friends at rez (I just found out how amazing they are), ate out many times (my wallet...:'(.. ), and enjoyed my SINGLE room(my roommate left long time ago)... Can you believe I still went to library to read after my exam? :) I just LOVE Trinity Library...the oven...the comfy couch...the wooden table....aaahh it's just a perfect place to read and relax!! :D Oh yeah, Pacific Mall...ppl said going there is part of being asain :) I liked that place....I so felt like going home. hehe. After that, I started to hang out with ppl from UC a lot..pool..pingpang...it's been REALLY fun....:) And... shopping with him *cough* became a highlight of my nice vacation in toronto..:P we were together just for 3-4 hrs, but I did enjoy a lot...mmm gotta have two weeks without seeing him....T.T. sigh~~still, it will be a close-ended story. oh well. don't want to think any more. Yeah life is good. I love my friends. I love UofT. I love Toronto.

Ever have that urge to get up and start yelling "MEN!" on the top of your lungs while pretending to be cutting a men suburi in the middle of the night? ( "men" is kendo term for mask/face, think a wack to the head ). Well I just had that urge... I think I'm turning psycho :D As usual, Judo was great fun for the whole family. Ok, maybe not the WHOLE family per say. There are plenty of injuries that can occur in Judo. Like today, I accidentally reinjured one of my sensei's knee while trying to do osoto-gari. Then I kinda caused this other guy to pull his muscle on this upper right leg while trying to counter his ippon seoinage. Yeah, it wasn't pretty, I felt like a walking black-curse or something. Before that, I cliped his chin with my elbow while practicing a throw ( I didn't do it on purpose, I swear!). Then he pulled his back by some other guy, and then got kicked in the balls....I guess we all have our bad days, I mean I injured my right foot 2 times already. Still, I feel kinda bad for that guy. I remember Eva commenting how she thinks Chinese martial art causes permenant damage to the body. I have to disagreed. It's been over three years since I started kungfu, and the worst injury I've had was a bloodied nose and a punch in the eye ( and messed up hands....but that's not the point ). So far I've more seriously injured myself in Judo than I ever have (except for that one time when I broke both of my arms, and that other time when I broke my right arm...again ). Yeah, so I can see my life-long injury already -- the stupid right foot. Oh, officially got my yellow belt today, that was cool. Very awsome practice today, randori was excellent ( aside from the um....injuries I caused )

Haha this is so funny.. too bad I can't understand the language ... :( http://www.gamedesigner.net/news.phtml?id=41

YAAAAAAAY!!! I'M DONE!!! so happy :D well...i only had one exam..so there's nothing much to say; but this CS exam was pretty..um...easy? (compared to past years) :P I did alright...hope I can get a good mark....but the most important thing is, I'm free too!! wuahahaha~~ whoa, it's so "late" now....heeheee....I treated myself TWO movies "last night"...Harry Potter and Die Another Day...sooo good :D Now one of my wishes has come true! :D

Went to the intermediate Judo practice today. It was so much fun. The head sensei is a 30ish Japanese guy of my height ( which is pretty short ). He's definitly skilled. I tried to work primarily on my ippon serinage. I think my technique have improved tremendously. The sensei was incredibly helpful in correcting my posture. I did ne waza with him and was chocked out twice. Ah....so much to learn.......

Whooot! My exam is finished, I'm free! Free I tell you! Wow, sweet sweet free time, what shall I do with you? *huges and kisses free time* worked more on the new site. Ah, so free! So nice! So expressionless! I have absolutely nothing better to say. Free time.......WOW.....

Um..haven't been here for a while....everything seems fine ..:) My first and last exam is tomorrow, and I'm so tired now. And....my roommate left to vancouver. I'm totally free now! hahahaha~~~:D welcome everybody!! :P

Last practice of Kendo for this term. I finally am able to put on the bogus ( the cool looking armors ), and got wacked over the head over and over again by the sempais :) Charles showed no mercy to the beginners, and beat us senseless. Haha, it was great. Went to eat with the sempais and the guys there after practice. It was lots of fun, Tony sensei told us a lot of funny stories. He started to practice about a month after I was born (!). Yeah, I'm reminded once again why I love martial arts so much. The hard work, the sweat, the mental concentration, the bond between practitioners...... You know what they say, Bu Da Bu Xiang Shi. Other than my childhood friends, some the closest friend I have are those who I have beat senseless in practice and vice versa.

Title : Grandfather�s retention In the darkest night, in the saddest sight, under the silver moon light, upon the lonely hill, there awaits master�s treasure, unforgettable treasure to be discover, many pass and go for centuries, yet only the unintentional ones gets a glance, for they�ve been troubling the unmatched tools, even though the right key is within their reach, the key might be a painful one, and the lock might be an ancient one, the experience might be unpleasant, the answer might be worthless, but under the right moment, using the right key, opening the right lock, answering the right riddle, will open a world so colorful and so wonderful, and so delightful, such that one will never again forget the treasure�s power, such that one will never again underestimate the treasure�s worth, and never again be sad. (Oh boy I haven't wrote a good poem for a long time now.) (I like this one, I just hope it not too simple, nor too deep for others to understand)

I'm exausted... Maybe I did get soft, seeing a simple night of judo practice drained so much energy out of me. I rarely even break a sweat before. Or...it maybe the beer that's floating around in my brain. The last of the beginner Judo classes ended today. I passed the ridiculously easy grading and am now a yellow belt. After been thrown like a toy during the grading ( to test our ukemi supposdly ), I proceeded to do three consecutive randori. It was fun as hell, tiring too. Since this was the last class of the term, a whole bunch of us headed down to O'Grady's for beer and chatted for a bit. It was great fun, Sabrina got pretty drunk after 2 shots and 4 cups of some sort of alcohol, and started laughing at how young I look -_-; So yeah, I'm really tired and sleepy right now. I plan to go to the intermediate classes next week, they are free until the begining of the next semester anyways, and I need to get back in shape. ... <-- my comment on Dex's poem ( see, no actual comment :P )

Title : Crazy D-er Mister Dexter is a master gangster who like his sister to become an inventor. He has a hamster under a quatre of a metre, name Baxter that lives in a twister, that way it is faster when racing against an blister. Others like Rooster, Lobster, and Oyster, are all envy of that buster. Here come the bunny from Easter, who is a game tester, her love for sweets are even sweeter, so is going to see who's fatter when comparing with Baxter. But Mr.Dexter stopped the disaster... (Stupid but cool) DON'T ANYONE DARE TO COMMENT ON THIS. other than me.

Title : Cocal swinging by the wind, dancing in the rain, under the moon light is the spot, above the lake is the slot, the inner warmth protects the soul, the inner strength protects the love, far away the sense still attach, far away the mind still fresh, floating in the air, freeing of care, what a dream...

Finaly I finished 4 Journals, Computer Assignment, Computer Quiz, Reading the humanity book, Statistic Assignment, Math Assignment, and Eco Assignment, all in 7 days jee, so much.. one thing left for this week, and that's the BIG ECO TEST.. Doh! going study after I finishes my poem.

Finally, Sociology test is over I went crazy and didn't sleep for over 30 hours. Needless to say, I slept like a baby yesterday night. Somehow, my program for Computer Science works. I have no idea how, I always thought there's a method or two that still need debugging. However, the program worked like a charm when I opened it today. Weird... I'm really sinking farther and farther into a craze for Saishu Heiki Kanojo. Christ, I think I'm becoming on of those fanboys. The serie is just so good! Maybe even better than Tokoyo Love Story ( Jane and Crystal: shock, gasp in horror )

Title : TeleSycH Under the harsh weather, I wonder...where art thou? I wonder... how art thou? My inner individual is so lonely with thy absence, My inner individual is so longing with thy image. The world holds no meaning when thou art gone, The world become colorful when thou art abreast. But when thou are needed, thou art nowhere, But when thou are forgotten, thou appear. In the berserk world, when do I see thou?

I might post some stupid stupid poems, sorry, because as you see poem can not be forced out of one's head, it can only emerge when itself is ready....(no one is forcing me but I just right some crazily bad poems here because, hm...) jee too much dumb poem, I can't even talk straight.!!!

Title : Brain Motion Graph the mind, of one mere kind, it would be a bind, of liquid and sand, When does it clears? No one knows... When does it drys? No one knows... How did it form? No one knows... How did it doom? No one knows... Only the feeling can speak of the treachery, Only the heart can purify the disgrace, Only the time can heal the wound.

Dear Jane : I am sorry that I couldn�t help you today in BA, I shouldn�t even bother making you come, I guess why I wished you to come with us is so that the place would not be too quite and empty. Tell you the truth at that time I so wanted to help you, but as you know a man should always keep their words, I have promised Connie that I will help, then I can�t just run off helping someone else, if you where the person that I promised to help, then what would you think if I ran off? To think about myself, I sometimes hated me, each project should be done by the assigned person, if one can�t do it, then one should ask for help from the appointed helper (TA), why do I always hang around? I don�t know, but what I do know is I shouldn�t. Only if the world has less people like me, it might be a more ordered and better place. Plus what a �show off�I am right? That�s something I wish I could change, if only you would know my childhood, where no one ever viewed me as a person of any knowledge. I am a sad sad person, I don�t know why when ever you get angry around me, I just go into a deep deep depression for unknown reason, that was what happened last time. Perhaps it was guilt... Anyways, you are a good friend of mine, just like David, only to a lesser extends, remember back on the day right before Thanksgiving? When you told me that you like to point out other people�s problems for that can help improve them? Well, I from friend�s point of view would tell you that you shouldn�t get angry too often, you are a sweet girl, but only if you can control your temper, you�ll be much better. Maybe at this time you won�t listen to me about the above point, and plus you don�t have to, but trust me it�ll be good for you, once again, I am not trying to act like a elderly, plus I never have, I only tell you because I am a friend. Your friend : Dex

Two new anime series I'm getting addicted on Tokyo Underground and Saishu Heiki Kanojo ( Ultimate(Final) Weapon Girlfriend ) Both have amazing animation quality and music, and both originated from manga. Tokyo Underground was drawn by Uraku Akinobu. Saishu Heiki Kanojo was drawn by Shin Takashi. I don't have the fortune of reading either in manga form yet. Well, I did read Saishu a bit, the first 3 chapters anyways. Take note Dex, if you want some quality animes for the Anime club, these should be it. And yeah, Vandread is awsome too...

Title : Burn DeEnergy Burn Under the hast, when death can not stand, when life can not fall, when stars are beneath, when the dirt are above, time never stop, time never start, days never end, days never begin. The view is red, the thought is dark, the smell is deciving, the eyes are burning. The DEXEN DACKELL.

Evangelion is crazy Just watched the "End of Evangelion". God it's so confusing and strange. No, the word strange doesn't even describe it. It's so freaky and disturbing. The second half makes no sense. People just started turning into orange liquids for no reason, and Shinji did absolutely nothing. What a useless character, did I mention I hate his voice acting as well? Truely the most pathetic excuse for a male protagonist ever. It's just so bad, even if the big mech( is that even a mech? I mean it's organic ) battle is cool. The animation was great too, but still, so strange and...bad. Actually, this film is so bad it's hilarious. The plot makes no sense, and became way too artsy in the second half. Yeah, it's late, and I'm tired.